Q: What is Bono Like at 5am? A: Jonny Wilkinson.

Bleedin' Bono kept us out 'till 5am there on Friday night as he and a few chancers, ahem singers, went on the Waxi Dargle. The band of bowsies were a singing and a dancing 'till the wee small hours celebrating their performance of 'The Ballad of Irish Stew' on The Late Late Show...

Bono

Celebrities are an inconsiderate bunch. Oh, they'll save your whales. Oh, they'll build your houses in Africa. They'll even adopt your orphans. But try and get them to leave a bar or club at a decent hour when there's a poor old paparazzo outside freezing his nuts off? Forget it. You Swines!

Bono

Well that's what happened on Friday night at the 'Town Bar & Grill' restaurant... Bono didn't leave the place until 5am, then did a strange Jonny Wilkinson-esque pose... Going for a punt Bono? And he wasn't even the last man standing. No. The bould Shane McGowan was still there at 5.30am! Feck that, we're out. Sir Edmund Hillary wouldn't chance frost-bite for an aul snap of a mouldy drunk MacGowan now, would he?

Bono

Apparently, Bono and his band of bowsies had an old fashioned hoolie in the venue after they passed the hat around for Ronnie Drew on The Late Late Show. Question is: why have they dedicated a song to a bowl of Irish stew? Someone reckoned that the song was in fact about some fella called Ronnie Drew, who looks like Santy, and sings in a band called The Dubliners. But that's just crazy talk. Everyone knows that Ronnie Drew is rhyming slang for Irish Stew. And that's the real truth. Bono wrote the song when he was hankering for a bowl of the brown stuff. You heard it here first.

The Maserati car of Sir Paul of Hewson

Anyhooo. As Bono headed for his waiting Maserati sports car, we still had to get the pictures back to HQ. Edit them. And get them to the papers. A thankless craft? You bet your bleedin' B****x! Quite peckish now for an aul bowl of Ronnie Drew. Hmmmm, where's the HP sauce?